As a friend, it is our responsibility to step alongside our mates during their times of need and support them, love them, listen to them and just be there for them. But how are we supposed to step up to the mark and be a friend to those people, if we never knew there was something going on in the first place?
Lots of people want to ride with you in the limo, but what you want is someone who will take the bus with you when the limo breaks down. – Oprah Winfrey
As New Zealanders, we seem to have this issue with our pride. We feel like we can’t burden other people with our problems, and we generally don’t want to cause a fuss or a scene. We have an international reputation for being laid-back and carefree, so the idea that we need to be open about our feelings and admit we actually have issues can be, naturally, quite difficult. We don’t always enjoy exposing our true state to our friends, admitting that we aren’t actually okay. Our immediate response to the question “How are you?” is “I’m good.” It’s hard to admit to yourself and others that you need support from a friend, but the reality is, there is freedom to be found in allowing yourself to address whatever may be going on. Everybody is different, but for me, I find I need to talk out my issues; my friend doesn’t even need to say much, just listen and let me somehow verbally process my emotions. Other people like to keep it inside, which is fine, but know that you have friends who are willing to walk alongside you in life, rather than just stand at a distance.
Friendship improves happiness, and abates misery, by doubling our joys, and dividing our grief. – Marcus Tullius Cicero
There is a magnet in your heart that will attract true friends. That magnet is unselfishness, thinking of others first; when you learn to live for others, they will live for you. – Paramahansa Yogananda